Ep# 181: 5 Reasons You're Not Getting the Opportunities You Want
Ever feel like you’re watching your peers land awesome media, get the speaking gigs, land the book deal, get to work with that great company, have opportunities that you dream of… while you’re over there grinding and waiting for your big break?
Why is it that some people seem to magnetize all of the golden opportunities while others seem to repel them?
Today I’m going to break down the 5 reasons why you’re not getting the opportunities you want and what to do to shift the pendulum in your favor.
No more feeling like it’s never going to happen for you… it’s your time. Let’s make it happen!
The 5 Reasons You're Not Getting the Opportunities You Want:
Reason One: Your mind has tricked you into thinking that you’re trying all the things and really putting yourself out there, when in reality you’re creating in a bubble, just waiting to be discovered, while your peers are actually pitching themselves for these big opportunities.
We have a tendency to allow our thoughts to become our reality, even if our physical reality isn’t aligned with those thoughts.
Here’s an example: You’re eying this perfect client on instagram. You know you’d be the perfect fit for her and she needs what you have. You follow her, maybe even comment on her posts, and you put your content out on social media almost like you’re speaking to her! But you’re not, and as a result you see her post three weeks later that she just hired a business coach and it wasn’t you. They stole her! Why did that coach get another client! You would have been perfect!
But guess what that other business coach did that you failed to do? She put herself out there. She made the pitch. She sold herself and her services.
The world is noisy and you won’t just be discovered.
So what’s the process of changing this?
If I opened your calendar or your to-do list, would I see this reflected as a priority?
You want this opportunity so badly, but the actual process of making this happen isn’t even on your list of things to do.
First, start by prioritizing your wishlist of opportunities. Consider which opportunities move the needle toward your long term vision, and then let go of the opportunities that sound great but ultimately take you off course.
What’s the next thing you desire that’s fully in alignment with both your values and moving you towards the bigger vision?
Don’t say that speaking gig just because it’s shiny and sexy and makes you feel important if you’re in a season where you don’t want to leave your kids and it doesn’t ultimately help you work towards what’s next.
Don’t say a bestselling book if you hate to write and don’t want to dedicate the next year at 5am to writing your book.
Then after you choose the next 3-5 opportunities that are in alignment, start to put them on your calendar and work backwards to figure out what’s required to land them.
If you really want to get that media feature, you’ll have to work for it. What contacts do you need to make and relationships do you need to nurture? Write up thoughtful pitches and come up with your plan to follow up.
Remember that this is not a one and done thing. It’s a process. All good opportunities are a process, not just a random grand slam.
Reason Two: You’re trying to base your future opportunities on your past successes. You think you’re deserving of more, but you’re hanging your hat on last year’s championship.
This is a big one for entrepreneurs who have seen success and have been validated or recognized for that success.
Sometimes we’re aiming at future opportunities because we feel deserving of them based on what we’ve proven previously, when in reality, we need to keep growing and up leveling to land our next opportunity.
Are the opportunities you want in line with the success you had or the success you’re having/ need to have?
Everyone wants success, but when you get it sometimes you get complacent.
We are either growing, or we’re dying. This is your chance to stop resting on your laurels and push yourself to what’s next. Set an opportunity goal that’s out of your reach today and figure out what you need to do to grow into what’s required.
Reason Three: You’re not going where you’re most gifted, so you’re not shining in your current space. You’re not operating in your true zone of genius. Point blank, you’re not making waves in your space.
Are you so good at what you do that people have no choice but to take notice?
Opportunities come to the people who are seen, who are better at what they do than others, or are unique/coming at what they do from a different angle than other people.
We tend to chase two things that can take us off track:
Our passions: passion is great but if you aren’t excellent at it, you won’t get as many opportunities as you could
What’s popular: when we surround ourselves with other people’s work, it’s bound to sway us and take us away from our true gifts
Instead of figuring out what our true gifting really is! Where is your skill and how can you do that so well that you can’t be ignored? Are you doing what’s popular? Or are you going where you’re called based on what you can do so well.
Most people listening here have had some successes - WHY did you have that success?
Maybe you didn’t have success as a business coach because you’re the best at business, but because you can read people incredibly well and you brought that gift to your business.
How can you do more of that?
How are you standing out?
Write down the 3 things you do better than anyone else.
Figure out how you can magnetize to monetize!
Reason four: You’re stalled out and you just need momentum.
Answers come to those who take action and those who take action will build momentum. It’s harder to stop an object in motion, even if it’s not perfect.
How long have you been sitting still or doing the basics, but not taking bigger leaps?
Look at your typical week: what needs to change to shake things up? Where do you have some new or big leaps in there?
Reason five: You’re not ready for the opportunity you really want and there’s a better plan in play.
I believe in God, and I believe that sometimes when a door slams in my face, even one I really wanted to open for me, there’s a bigger plan at play.
Sometimes we get a “no” because we aren’t ready for that “yes.” That “no” will save you from what would have happened if it were a “yes” and you weren’t ready for it.
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